Our new website. It’s complicated.
Just under our logo, a space is set for what is technically referred to as ‘a blurb’. Once populated with the right words, it will convey to even the most impervious mind what kind of site their little-thought-search-term landed them on.
That’s sort of my job for this new website.
You ‘land’ on it; not even a feature. From our logo you will rightly assume the company trying to get into your pockets here is called Blow. Definitely not ‘This Is Blow’ – it’s so obvious why we would need to compromise our domain name, you should have your voting rights revoked if you even need to think about it.
Be that as it may, dear reader, you still might rightly proclaim ‘this begs a question’ and I agree. What is ‘a Blow’ likely to offer that you cannot live without? Or live without, fine – but then, what keeps you from running head first into a rusty nail? We’re important, surely. ‘Cannot live without Blow’ this is the KPI my free lunch money bonus is tethered to.
Our blurb is in ALL CAPS.
Let people know we’re important.
And if possible, we want to show a few logos right away.
Three. That’s good. You like what you see and I’m halfway to having my employer pay for spicy beef nachos.
Let’s see. I’m set on my opening line… I’ll make that bold… the rest just needs to be straight to the dome and short as fuck. Nobody has time for anything anymore.
WE MAKE BRANDS.
BLOW IS AN UNALIKE. A BOUTIQUE CREATIVE AGENCY, RUN BY A BUNCH OF CRAZY GUYS THAT RESPECT ONLY TWO THINGS: NOTHING AND NOBODY.
A JERSEY PIZZA SHOP, AN AUSSIE ONLINE VIDEO ADVERTISING AND TALENT COMPANY OR A MULTINATIONAL MEDIA AGENCY, THEY ALL GET THE SAME UNPREDICTABLE TREATMENT.
Oh Jesus.
…
I really should tell people why work with us.
WE MAKE BRANDS.
IF YOU DON’T MAKE BRANDS YOURSELF, BUT YOU WANT A BRAND; YOU HAVE A BUSINESS, A PRODUCT OR A SERVICE AND NEED A BRAND; YOU HAVE JUST A LOGO BUT NOT A BRAND YET; YOU DON’T EVEN HAVE A NAME OR YOU HAVE NOTHING BUT A VAGUE IDEA OF A BUSINESS THAT COULD BE SOMETHING IF IT ONLY HAD A BRAND; OR YOU HAVE YOUR BRAND BUT IT’S NO GOOD; MAYBE YOUR BRAND IS ALRIGHT BUT THERE IS NOTHING YOU HAVE TO SAY ABOUT IT OR NOBODY EVER LISTENS
– WE’D LIKE TO MEET YOU.
IF YOU ALREADY HAVE A GOOD BRAND, WE WILL MAKE THAT, TOO. AND IF IT’S ALREADY MADE, WE WILL MAKE IT BETTER. NOTHING WE CAN’T MAKE BETTER. YOUR BUSINESS CAN BE A MULTINATIONAL MEDIA AGENCY, AN AUSSIE ONLINE VIDEO ADVERTISING AND TALENT COMPANY OR A SMALL, JERSEY PIZZA SHOP
– WE MAKE THE LOT.
A bit complex, but more like it! Maybe, a little more hand holding though.
WE MAKE BRANDS.
YES, LOGOS, WEBSITES AND STUFF. BUT A BRAND IS INHERENTLY SO MUCH MORE THAN AN ICON OR A NAME. PRINT IS DEAD; MARKETING, SPAM AND THE INTERNET IS FULL OF PORN, BUT BLOW CAN TAKE YOU BY THE HAND AND INTRODUCE EXCEPTIONAL WAYS TO COMMUNICATE YOUR BRAND TO CARING AUDIENCES. OUR CLIENTS ENTRUST US WITH THEIR LIFE’S WORK, MAYBE A STAGE OF THEIR LIFE, OK, THEIR IDEAS, THEIR VISION – IN ANY CASE, SOMETHING INCREDIBLY SPECIAL. WE DON’T TAKE THIS FOR GRANTED, EVER. YOUR BRAND COULD BE A SMALL JERSEY PIZZA SHOP, AN AUSSIE ONLINE VIDEO ADVERTISING AND TALENT COMPANY OR A MULTINATIONAL MEDIA AGENCY. YOU’RE SAFE, IN CAPABLE, WARM HANDS. NOW WIPE YOUR NOSE.
Ok, that last line was a joke, but it started to sound like talking to wide-eyed toddlers. More corporate. And more balls.
WE MAKE BRANDS.
BLOW IS THE NOTORIOUS EXPERT IN BRAND IDENTITY – A SYDNEY-BASED BOUTIQUE AGENCY, SPECIALISED TO TAKE BRANDS FROM INCEPTION TO MARKET AND OFFER CLIENTS A WORLD OF POSSIBILITIES TO BRING THEIR BRANDS TO LIFE. WE WORK WITH A WIDE ARRAY OF PRESTIGIOUS BUSINESSES FROM ALL DIFFERENT INDUSTRIES, RANGING FROM PIZZA SHOPS, OVER VIDEO AND TALENT COMPANIES TO MULTINATIONAL MEDIA AGENCIES. NO CLIENT IS TOO SMALL FOR US AND FOR SURE NONE IS TOO BIG OR TOO POWERFUL. FOR A COMPLETE LIST OF OUR CLIENTELE, PLEASE SCROLL TO ‘CLIENTS’ BELOW AND BE READY TO HAVE YOUR MIND… LEVELLED.
Too much?
WE MAKE BRANDS.
WE HAVE NO IMAGINATION AND ONLY EVER PLAY IT SAFE OR GET ‘INSPIRED’ BY STUFF THAT OTHER PEOPLE ALREADY CREATED – CAUSE WE HAVE NO BALLS AND BASICALLY DO WHATEVER IS TRENDY RIGHT NOW, BE IT FOR PIZZA, VIDEO ADVERTISING OR MEDIA. IF YOU REALLY THINK ABOUT IT, THAT MAKES A LOT OF SENSE FOR US AS WE WILL NEVER OFFEND ANYBODY BUT STILL LOOK COOL… YOU THINK IT WILL WORK FOR YOUR BRAND TOO?
AWESOME! WE WOULD LIKE TO MEET YOU.
(PLEASE, PLEASE CALL US. WE WILL DISCOUNT OUR PRICES TO MEET YOUR BUDGET. PROMISE.)
Fuck it. I’m done here.
I need a drink and come back to this another day.
It will be on thisisblow.com some day – don’t hold your breath though. It’s complicated.
MD’A